By Caitlin Johnstone
August 23, 2021"Information
Clearing House" -It happened suddenly and
unexpectedly, as drastic changes often do.
You awoke in the morning from an unusual sleep,
and something about your waking experience was very
different. You couldn’t say what exactly, but there
was a deep relaxation. A clenching you’d always
carried with you simply wasn’t there anymore, a
clenching you’d never even noticed until it was
gone.
Everything was very still.
You removed your blankets and swung your legs
over the side of the bed, just like every other
morning before, but this morning something very
different happened. When you stood up, “you” didn’t
come with.
Standing happened. There just wasn’t anyone doing
it. The body was upright, there was the experience
of pressure on the bottoms of the feet and cool
morning air on the skin. But it wasn’t happening to
anybody.
The sensation of being a self wasn’t there
anymore. The energetic contraction in the body
around the belief in a separate “me” character had
left and been replaced with nothing, leaving only
wide openness and inseparability.
The eyes moved around the room, and rather than
experiencing this as a person looking out at the
world it was instead simply appearances appearing to
no one in an inseparable field of experience, with
the bridge of the nose no more personal than the
wall. The bird songs and other morning noises arose
in the same way: as impersonal appearances with no
separate hearer.
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Thoughts about what was happening began to
flicker, but they sputtered out and lost their
energy as quickly as they arose. They were premised
on a context that simply wasn’t there anymore;
without the thinker being experienced as a real
entity, they simply showed up as mental noises,
without being imbued with the power of belief.
Thinking could certainly be used as necessary, but
putting together a string of compulsive thoughts
would’ve been like trying to build a tower on the
surface of a bottomless lake. There just wasn’t any
foundation to build on anymore.
Without belief in the thinking, knowing,
labeling, dividing me-mind, life was suddenly
experienced as a perfect mystery. Everything that
arose was simply an impersonal appearance appearing
to no one in a timeless, boundless openness, with no
notion that anything needed to be done about it.
Everything was infinite perfection.
This all came with a deep and profound peace, a
peace that was clearly seen to have always been
there all along, with only the belief in the mind
and its incessant babbling stories about “self” and
“other” obscuring it. This is the natural state of
human consciousness. The unaltered state. The
unconfused state. Not even truly hidden, simply
overlooked because of its simplicity. The self which
seemingly disappeared had never truly been there in
the first place. It was all an illusion. A dream.
And it was immediately understood that this is
the underlying cause of all misery in our world.
Humans mistakenly believing their bodies and minds
to be separate from the universe, separate from the
swirling sea of life on this planet, constructing
psychological me-characters to symbolize the plight
of each human organism and then using believed
thoughts to try and ensure the safety and security
of that fictional character.
And from there those illusory mental ego
constructs set about competing with what they
perceive to be other selves out there in the world,
trying to manipulate and control them to guarantee
the me-character is safe from harm and always has
enough of what it needs. The cleverest ego
characters figure out how to manipulate people at
mass scale, using their tendency to believe mental
narratives against them and planting power-serving
ideas in their minds.
And it was seen that this is all ultimately the
result of being a species with a newly-evolved
capacity for abstract thought giving birth to babies
at a highly undeveloped stage due to the size of
their newly-evolved brains relative to the size of
the birth canal. We spend our formative years as
helpless organisms surrounded by giants, and as our
ability to think comes online we start trying to use
it to protect ourselves from traumatic experiences
like being startled or left crying in the dark a
little too long. Before the age of two we’ve
constructed a mental “me” character so that we can
use various strategies for getting what we want,
leading to the construction of more and more
egocentric mental habits of increasing complexity
that are all geared toward trying to keep us safe.
It’s simply an innocent mistake, made by very
young members of a very young species. When people
talk about the “ego” they are referring to something
that has no actual independent reality; it describes
a series of mental habits that are energetically
imbued with the power of belief out of concern for
the safety and security of the organism. Contrary to
what some say, the path to peace is not to “get rid
of the ego” or to “kill the ego”, but for life to
open its eyes to the reality that the ego never
actually existed as a real thing in the first place.
And it was seen that there’s not actually any
reason humanity cannot collectively awaken to this
perspective. The ability to awaken from the illusion
of the mental self exists within us all, and
probably exists for a reason. Every species
eventually reaches a point where it must adapt to
changing conditions in an ever-changing world, and
with egoic consciousness threatening our existence
with climate collapse and nuclear war we are most
certainly arriving at that point today.
But it was also seen that if this does not
happen, that too will be perfect. Only the ego seeks
to control life against life’s will, and if it is
life’s will that humanity go the way of the dinosaur
then that will have the same thunderous beauty as
every other appearance twirling within this eternal
mystery void.
The eyes were open. Everything was clearly
perceived. The illusions were no more.
And with that, no one got dressed, and prepared
to start the day.
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